


Famous Last Words

by InLoveAndSqualor



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Bandom - Freeform, M/M, MCR
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-20
Updated: 2009-03-20
Packaged: 2017-11-04 05:17:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/390181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InLoveAndSqualor/pseuds/InLoveAndSqualor





	Famous Last Words

I’ve always liked things I shouldn’t like. 

Like those gory fake-bloodstained films that would run late night on weekends when I was a kid and that would scare me half to death. Or at school when the other kids got bored and decided to pick on me. When they would push me around and shove me into lockers; sometimes, just sometimes, I’d like it. I’d like it and when they hit me I’d wish they would have hit me harder.

And now it’s the same, I’m the same. I like the way a shot of whisky burns at my mouth and throat with its harsh metallic heat. I like the tattoo needle that scratches and burns and warms my flesh when it runs along my inches. 

And I like Gerard Way.

I like the way on desultory occasions he sneaks into my room at night. The way he takes a violent hold of my hair, or my throat, or my wrists and hisses in my ear, ‘I’m going to have you, and you’re going to let me and you’re going to like it’. 

I know I probably shouldn’t like the way he bites down too hard on my lip when we kiss; and forces me to taste my own blood. I feel wrong for liking it when he tugs hard at my hair just for the thrill and my head jerks back and my neck aches and my mind screams and my body loves it.

I like the way he claims me as his prize, his object; because at that moment I am all he wants. 

I like the pain and I even like the loveless want; because it’s base and raw and animalistic. It is sexuality distilled and I am at its mercy.

I like the way when I’m with him it’s the one time I don’t have to feel in control. 

I like it because he just takes me, and doesn’t give me a choice, and then he grins at me when he see my eyes begging for it all. He smiles so deeply when my body bends and responds to his wondrous touch.

I’ve always liked the things I felt I shouldn’t. That’s why I like him so much and those sordid things he has us do. 

But then there’s days, there’s moments, when I know I like the things I should. 

I like the way daffodils shine in great gold swathes, in fields far from town, on heady heavy summer days. Or the way the sound of a guitar, and the faultless riff that comes from it, floats through the air to reach my ears and stirs within my brain a feeling of peace or love or exhilaration. And I know I like those rare, almost stolen, ephemeral moments when Gerard will hold me close to him before he leaves.

I think that one day, when I have the courage and when we’re alone, I’ll put an uncertain hand on his chest and a trembling other on his cheek and I’ll ask him to kiss me. And then I’ll whisper so softly that he can barely hear me and I’ll tell him the truth; I’ll tell him that I love him.

I think I’d like that.


End file.
